Friday, April 14, 2017

Day 5: Confuscious say: the ego is trying to confuse you.

My brain feels like it is clutter with crap such as:

  • Son: finding him a place to live during his internship, will the internship be a good fit, what will he do in the fall? Will he get a big boy job?  
  • Daughter: wedding; what am I forgetting?  Is she really old enough to be a wife?
  • Body: I do everything right yet I cannot get rid of this extra weight.
  • Business: It is a mess.

Now I have a choice:

Option 1: continue to allow this crap to clutter my mind and steal my peace.  Benefits: somewhere deep inside I believe that worry = love.

Option 2: Turn it off by numbing out with television, food, napping.

Option 3: be very clear of my part and what is not my part and give the rest over to God and my guides.

I choose option #3 obviously.  So how do I make this work?

I have created a practice where I utilize my serenity sheet. 

Step 1: Write the worrisome event:  For my son I have a few items: Will the internship be a good fit:

Then below the event, I make two columns: what I control and what I don't control.

Under the what I control I write all the items that are within my control.  In this instance, not a whole lot is in my control except to make sure Austin knows how to get to his internship, where he can eat healthy meals, where is the laundromat.  

What I don't control: how people treat him, if he catches onto what is required. If he makes friends.

Then I tear the paper in half and I literally give the write side: what I do not control to God and my guides by putting them in my God box.  

Finally, I picture him happy, protected and flourishing.

2 comments:

  1. Powerful tool.

    What also struck me here was: somewhere deep inside I believe that worry = love.

    Where does that come from? What does that mean, what does it look like?

    Did you used to feel that food = love? If so, what in that healing process allowed you to shift? Where can you do something similar here?

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    Replies
    1. Wow that is a lot to think about. First, as far as food; it was my drug. I didn't feel love from it. Food's job was to shut the bitch up in my brain.

      The worry equals love comes from when I was little and from family

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